Women's Ministry

I was having lunch with some girlfriends last week when one of them asked me if I had read the book, Fifty Shades of Grey.  I quickly responded with, “Absolutely not!”  She really didn’t think I had, but that was her lead-in to introducing me to another movie coming out on the same release date as Fifty ShadesOLD FASHIONED.

women's ministry idea for Fifty Shades


OLD FASHIONED is a great movie about old fashioned courtship, which is the exact opposite to the message of Fifty Shades.  See more information here.

Women's Ministry alternative to 50 Shades


Both movies release on Friday, February 13, the day before Valentine’s Day.

I have a genuine concern for women, especially Christian women, who seem to easily get caught up in any type of porn.  While some feminists applaud women’s sexual freedoms, porn, even soft porn, is really degrading, AND sinful.

fifty shades no



  1. I don’t aspire to be a silly or gullible woman who is captivated by lust. I desire to continue my journey of becoming a confident, godly woman.

 For of this sort are those who creep into households and make captives of gullible women loaded down with sins, led away by various lusts, 2 Timothy 3:6


  1. I don’t follow the crowd of pop culture. I have taken up my cross and desire to follow Jesus, forsaking the lies and vulgarity of this world.

I will not look with approval on anything that is vile. I hate what faithless people do; I will have no part in it. Psalm 101:3


  1. I don’t want to know what ungodly people do in the bedroom. What I don’t know, I won’t talk about.

It is shameful even to talk about the things that ungodly people do in secret. Ephesians 5:12


If I can be real for a minute, I could’ve written my own version of Fifty Shades of Grey when I was young and under the heavy influence of the deceiving feminists who said that women could fool around like men do and never be affected by it.  Let’s just say that I’ve lived AND learned!  Although I’m quite sure my past pales in comparison to Fifty Shades of Grey, it’s a lifestyle that left me feeling lonely and loveless – I refuse to celebrate it by seeing it!!!

When I really think about it, I am not sure why women like to celebrate the storyline of this book.  I love what the OLD FASHION’S director, Rik Swartzwelder, said of the two movies…

” Swartzwelder added. “Think of a young woman you care about… Which love story would you wish for her?” (October 13, 2014 Christian Post article).  

Even though OLD FASHION may only be seen in a couple hundred movie theaters while Fifty Shades will be shown in a couple thousand, I don’t know of any one who truly would not want young women to have a sweet love story over a raunchy sexcapade.  Maybe I am naive, but hopefully not.

Women's Ministry counters Fifty shades

So, as a Director of Women’s Ministry, here is what I am going to do:

  1. On February 13, we are going to round up a bunch of women and go see OLD FASHIONED.
  2. We are going to provide cute T-Shirts for us to wear with the OLD FASHIONED logo so no one will mistake this posse for a bunch of girlfriends out to see Fifty Shades
  3. We are going to use the movie’s resources for churches from their website as applicable and appropriate to our women’s ministry calendar of events.

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I encourage you to plan some anti-Fifty Shades initiatives to contrast what is godly and ungodly.  Even if some of the women from your church go see it, they will not be able to without thinking of the counter-culture message you’ve sent.  Hopefully, you will be able discourage many who planned to view it.

If you want to read more about the contrast of the two movies, read here and here.

I would love to hear your ideas for countering Fifty Shades; please use the comments section below.

Spur On!


And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds, Hebrews 10:24

Hey, Women’s Ministry Leaders/Directors/Team Members!

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Award-winning author Gina Duke is a wife, mom and the Director of Women’s Ministry at her local church. With a B.S. in Organizational Leadership, she is able to bring a clear word for authentic Christian living. Through her book, “Organizing Your Prayer Closet: A New and Life-Changing Way to Pray” (Abingdon Press), she imparts 1 Peter 4:7 with the gift of structured prayer journaling. You may also follow her on Twitter and Instagram @TheGinaDuke.

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  1. Hi Gina! I love this post! As a mother raising 2 daughters & 4 sons I so much agree with that quote you mentioned about the love story I desire for them. I hadn’t heard of “Old Fashioned” until I read your post, but I will certainly look into it now. Thank you for your honest words about true freedom in Christ & His ways!

    1. Woo, Katy, I am sure you are one busy mama! I am the mom of two girls and I only have the younger one left. Yes, I pray, too, that she has a wonderful love story and avoids the pitfalls I was not wise enough to navigate around. Trusting God. I am looking forward to his movie. My friend had previewed it and said it was good. ~gina

  2. Thank you! I didn’t know about “Old Fashioned.” I hope there’s a showing around my area. I look forward to the release of “The Song” on DVD. It’s also a great movie to counter “Fifty Shades of Grey.” Stopping by from Coffee for Your Heart 🙂

    1. Thanks for stopping by, Angela! I was glad to hear about this movie from a friend. Here is a link to the movies’ site that has a list of selected theaters. I hope one is near you, too! ~gina

  3. Gina, , I love your idea! I would love to see that (other) movie! I hope it comes to a theatre near me (I sound like the movie man). When asked if I’ve read the books, and I’ve answered no, I’ve had so many people tell me, “Oh, but the story is great! It’s a love story.” If I want to read a love story, I’ll read a sappy one that leaves things that people do in private to my imagination. I also hate “love scenes” in movies…why are they even there? At my age, I could care less that 20 year olds are feeling the need to release their sexual tension every time they turn around. Been there, done that. Don’t fit into the tee shirt anymore. Great post! Great idea!

    1. Mary, you are so funny! And on point!!! It’s not a love story. It’s a story of abuse from I hear. I’m working on our T-Shirts right now!!! Check the link to the movie and there is a tab to tell you where the movie will be showing. It looks like mostly in the southeast.

  4. I just heard about this movie yesterday, but didn’t have time to read about it and then lost the article on it. I am glad I found this post. I certainly wish these kinds of movies could get the same publicity as 50 Shades manages to get. With any luck Old Fashioned will be playing in my area. I hope you ladies have a wonderful time going out to watch it.

  5. Wow, I’ll have to look up that movie. I am in complete agreement with the 50 shades of Grey nonsense. What is sad is that the book started out as Twilight fan-fiction… so even teenagers are reading it. It gives an unrealistic idea of what love looks like. It’s light BDSM in a nutshell, and no I haven’t read it. But, I’ve read enough reviews to know what I’m saying is true. I really hope it’s a box office flop, but knowing the way the world is today… I doubt it. We can pray though that it will be and that people will see through the lies portrayed in it.

    1. Hannah, you bring up a good point. I haven’t even thought about teens reading it. Terrible! But you know I was a huge fan of Judy Blume’s Tales of the Fourth Grade Nothing growing up and when my daughters got old enough to read fiction, I looked at some of her writings for teens and guess what – soft porn! This particular book detailed a young teenager’s first sexual encounters. And to think I almost bought it for my daughter!!! Makes me sick! We have to be on the lookout for young ones for sure!!! Thanks for sharing.

  6. I’ve never heard of this movie (Old Fashioned)! It sounds great. I never read 50 Shades and never will. That’s not what we’re to fill our minds with. We are to think on things that are good, pure, noble, etc. 🙂 I would encourage women who have read the book to stand firm against the temptation to see the movie and vow to not put that garbage into their minds. Great post!

  7. I had not heard about this movie, Gina. Thank you for speaking out against Fifty Shades of Grey and speaking out for Old-Fashioned. I’ll be looking for it, and talking to my friends about it. We definitely need to protect our eyes and hearts from the evil in this world. Blessings to you. Connecting from Coffee for Your Heart today.

  8. Thank you for this. I have not seen the movie or read the book (I don’t want to), and don’t understand what the hype is all about. Why would anyone want to degrade themselves? I will definitely be looking out for Old Fashioned!

  9. Gina, I totally agree with you. The thought of reading the book or seeing the movie is repulsive to me. Old Fashioned sounds like a fun way to counter it in your women’s ministry. But may I suggest another resource? I just went to presession conference with Shannon Ethridge, who is fantastic at helping people reconcile our spiritual and sexual natures and she has written a book in response to Fifty Shades of Grey called the Fantasy Fallacy. This link: http://www.shannonethridge.com/the-fantasy-fallacy/ has more information on the book, as well as a promo trailer for it. I think it would be a great resource for countering Fifty Shades of Grey, but also helping women better understand the roots of sexual fantasies.

  10. I think a lot of us could write a Fifty Shades of Grey of our own. At least the ones who had an experimental youth, who wanted to know for themselves, and who bought to the women can be all that men can be sexually -lie.
    And it would be an interesting counterpart to the Fifty Shades, because it would be such a truthful, sorrow filled movie. It might not be as popular, because the thing about Hollywood is that it’s all big, beautiful lie. Thruth doesn’t sell, especially sad and heartbreaking truth about how broken someone becomes from trying to act something like Fifty Shades for true out in their lives.
    Now, Hollywood would be fast, and the author also I presume, to tell us that it’s just a movie, just an elaborate feast for imagination.
    But the sad truth, again, is that there are countless young women who wish to live it for real. Who do seek for what they imagine the truth after seeing in a movie and reading it in a book. And get broken, bodily and in spirit, as result of it.

    1. So true, Joanna! Even though some women live this sexually free lifestyle, I truly believe they are searching to be loved. We associate physical interactions as demonstrations of love and care. We lie to ourselves. It’s sad, but true.

  11. I find the whole Sahes of Grey popularity alarming but not surprising. How sad women would fantasize through reading & watching about such a precious intimate act in this way. Good on you and your women for taking a stand!

  12. What a fantastic idea! I hope other churches will do the same. When we band together we can make a difference!

    I read the book “Old Fashioned” a few weeks ago and am looking forward to seeing it play out on the big screen!

    1. That is neat that you got to read the book. I can’t wait to see the storyline. Too bad we can’t go together!!!

  13. Hi, Gina, I hadn’t heard of either movie, but I whole-heartedly agree with supporting movies that promote Christian values. It is the only way we have to send Hollywood a message. It sounds like many of your readers hadn’t hear of “Old Fashioned” so you’ve succeeded in making more people aware of a good thing! Blessings!

  14. Hi Gina,
    I just happened upon your site because I felt “suspicious” of Shannon Etheridge’s popular espousal of “Fifty Shades of Grey”. – I have not and will not read the book, although from what I’ve read, it is a contemporized version of “The Story of O”, which is a “classic” porn piece about sado-masochism. It is existentialist ( written in France, decades ago)- in its essence. A young woman is seduced and gradually gives up her name, becoming “O” – easily interpreted as nothing, or zero, don’t you think? She has willfully surrendered her soul for masochistic delight. She has chosen to opt out on her soul through her sexual/moral capitulation. Existentialists deny the existence of God, so the book ends without an ending other than the woman being passed on to the next owner, for use.

    Anyway, I’m glad I found your site. I have a horrid past r/t nearly all the taboos that illicit fantasies celebrate. It’s so easy to destroy a child. – Anyway, I clawed my way to Jesus after the predictable years of feminism-inspired promiscuity. You gotta believe my violent childhood enacted a lot of those self-destructive behaviors. But now, as a free, saved woman of middle years, I acknowledge how much our WILL and MORAL CHOICE has to do with who we are.

    Gina, I am not my childhood. I am God’s child, and a woman of virtue. The struggle for that virtue never quits though. Satan is right around the corner waiting, – especially if you’re fool enough to think that you’re finally “home free”. That will happen when He arrives to take me home.

    Sorry if I pontificated, but I don’t blog and….God bless you for your work. You were difficult to find. – I had to swim through a lot of Etheridge sites. I knew I’d find a Christian woman of true virtue – you, if I kept trying. Blessings! Victoria

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